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Pick a God and Praise Him – Fratellis Split

Life isn’t always a bed of roses, but sometimes something happens which brings a smile to your face. The news that the lumpen awfulness that was Scottish ‘rock’ band The Fratellis are no more will cause scenes of unbridled joy across the nation as music lovers get down on their knees and praise whatever forces, celestial or otherwise,  caused it.

Posting on the band’s website, singer and guitarist John wrote: “Mince, Baz and I are working on music but not with each other.”

Mince….Baz….Jesus. Says it all, really.

The Fratellis wore out their welcome before it was even extended. Were they so bad? Yes. Their first album Costello Music was popular with people who owned Burberry caps and drank fortified wine. Rare was the day when a souped-up washing machine on wheels didn’t drive past you with ‘Chelsea Dagger’ blaring at top volume.

They sold shedloads of albums and helped lower the lowest common denominator another point on the scale. ‘Whistle for the Choir’ and ‘Henrietta’ are songs so bad they make one yearn for a trip to the Dignitas clinic.

So, in memorium, can ELM just wish the band members a looooooooooooong and happy retirement, with the emphasis on the long. Please just go away for good.


4 Responses

  1. I love the Fratellis and everything you have just written is wrong!

  2. No it isn’t.

  3. yes it is

    (this could go on a while)

  4. Praise be. I fucking hate them. His new band are shit as well.

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